Ev’rybody Wants To Be A Cat

I don’t know how it has escaped me all these years, particularly when I studied Film Noir at TAFE and at university, but today I suddenly realised the connection between Film Noir and cats.

It’s as simple as this: a cat is a classic Femme Fatale. This is true regardless of the gender of the cat in question, although I can only use my own cat as a example, and she is a female.

A Femme Fatale is the mysterious and seductive woman whose charms ensnare her lovers, often leading them into compromising, dangerous, and deadly situations.  The tradition of the Femme Fatale has a long history in literature and art, going back to Medea, Cleopatra and other like-minded, strong-willed gals who just wouldn’t do what they were told.

Like cats, Femme Fatales can’t decide if they want to go in the door, or out the door.

Pic: Indieflix

In the American Film-Noir of the 1930s and 40s, the Femme-Fatale was often the driving force behind the narrative. In some of the classic Noir films, such as my all-time favourite, Double Indemnity, the film begins with the hero (or anti-hero) dying, dead, or if he’s lucky, maybe just locked up – and narrating the story of his own downfall in a long flashback. That device gives the story a sense of ill-fatedness right from the beginning. (Another well-known example where that device is used is Sunset Boulevard.)

Lo and behold, sooner or later, the hapless hero will meet a woman, and it usually turns out that this dame will be behind his fall-from-grace/death. Sometimes that may not have been a direct intention of the Femme Fatale, but one thing she will never do is show any regret: if the hero’s demise is what it takes, then that’s how it has to be.

So, that’s the Femme Fatale and where she comes into contemporary film history, in 100 words or less. (or more, give or take.) Now, before any film students dismiss the notion that there is a link between cats and Femme-Fatales, consider the adjectives that are used to describe the Femme Fatale:

narcissistic

manipulative

deadly

mysterious

villaneous

morally ambiguous

Dominating

destructive

unrepentant

I feel confident that anyone who has a cat will be nodding their head in recognition at this point, but for those who don’t, let me run you through some examples.

Manipulative? Hell yeah! I’ve already described in another post how my cat will sit at the door, 3 feet away from the cat flap, and meowing plaintively to be let out. If we don’t respond, this will often be followed by the sound of the door rattling as she pushes against it, or, if outside, dramatically throws herself at the screen door and clings on like a flying possum. Is there a cat anywhere in the world that merrily goes in and out the cat-flap by itself, if/when there are human beings in earshot?

(If you have such a cat, please send a photo to the P.O. box address at the top of the page.* We will send you a $5 coupon to cover the cost of postage, and throw the photo in the recycling bin.)

Villaneous? I call meowing loudly and adamantly at 5am in the morning for about half an hour, and then stealthily disappearing, (making the point that there was no reason whatsoever for the meowing, except to disturb and distress the humans in the house) akin to torture. Clearly it’s a plan to ensure that the humans are in a half-dazed, sleep-deprived state throughout the day. Villaneous? Oh yeah.

Unrepentant? You betcha. The disinterested stare is as emotional as it gets.

Destructive? – My sad and sorry couch is ample evidence of the destructive effect on upholstery that being scratched with claws daily – or sometimes, in manic periods, at 5 minute intervals – will achieve over a period of 7 years.

Dominating? If the above has not already answered this for you, let me fill you in on the meowing that goes on until any current need is satisfied, whether that is the need to be fed, the need to be let out the door, the need to come straight back in the door again, or the need to be picked up and patted, but only, of course, until the cat has had enough patting. You better be sensitive to that mood-swing or you’ll find out, via a sharp scratch as she decides to get the hell out of your arms after all.

If you ask her to untie you, a Femme Fatale will stare past you with bored disinterest –  just as a cat would, if you asked her the same thing.

Pic: Matt DeRody

Deadly? Witness my cat, out in the garden, her body flattened down as low as it can go, creeping through the grass, commando style, eyes fixed on some point about 6 feet away. I can assure you, she is not tracking the wild-life with the same intent that David Attenborough has when he behaves in a similar fashion. She is mostly unsuccessful with birds, but regularly brings live skinks into our house, (minus their tales, which must prefer to stay outside), presumably to play with until they die of fright. We have to catch the poor little things and set them free.

Morally ambiguous? Surely anyone who does all of the above and then sits around looking like the cat that got the cream, clearly has a different moral radar than the rest of us. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look regretful for a moment. Conveniently for her conscience, the moment after she has exhibited any “bad behaviour” she is compelled to sit down and engage in an intense cleaning session, which is clearly so absorbing and distracting that in another second, she has forgotten what just happened.

What? What happened?

What is the problem? Great cream, btw.

Mysterious? Indeed. Take a look at her when she is sitting in the sun, eyes squinting but still slightly open, as if keeping watch in her sleep. Who ever knows what a cat is thinking, or when they will decide they’ve had enough patting and need to swipe at you to let you know that?

In short, if you come across your cat reclining elegantly in a dark corner, lit only by slits of light coming through the venetian blinds, looking blankly towards you with those half closed eyes, beware. Be particularly cautious if she is smoking a long-stemmed cigarette. There is probably a gun somewhere under that innocent-looking fur.

Having established the link between cats and Femme-Fatales, I thought it would be useful to review some famous Film Noir titles, as they would be if cats were given proper credit.

The Long Meow

The Slow-Roasted Falcon

Ninefold Indemnity

The Big Sleep That I Ended

The Big Steal, or, The Chicken Vanishes

Farewell, My Lovely Skink

The Lady (Fish) in the Lake

You Only Live Nine Times

In A Lonely Place (At the Top Of A Tree)

Tight Spot (At The Top Of A Tree) (the sequel)

A Touch of Evil In The Dog Next Door

There we have it. So, students of Film-Noir, take note. Many books and articles have been written analysing Noir films, but I have as yet to find any that take an in-depth look into whether cats were the original inspiration for the Femme Fatale. It’s a PHD just waiting to happen.

*

*There is no P.O. box address at the top of this page.

Consulted in the course of writing this post, with apologies to those sites. If you are interested in the topic, they will give you a far more indepth look at Film Noir than I have:

Wikipedia

Indieflix Blog

Film Noir Studies

Matt deRody