Dear Internet,
How are you? I’m enjoying my holiday, but the weather has not actually been all that good, to be honest.
And while I’m being honest…..I sense that this is where I should say that I miss you, particularly with the bad weather and all. Well, I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but….. I’m not missing you as much as I expected to. Please don’t be upset – let me explain.
I’m down in South Gippsland, at Walkerville, a “town” (consisting of some houses, a campground and a kiosk) near Walkerville Beach and within a half hour drive to Wilson’s Promontory, one of Australia’s most famous, and beautiful national parks. It’s beautiful here, and of course it’s possible to look at pictures of this area of Victoria on you, internet, but they don’t measure up to being down amongst the real thing.
What’s more, your absence has caused my daughter and I to have some old-fashioned interactions. For example, while watching Glee on the TV at our rented beach shack, she asks me, the all-knowing parent figure, how far Ohio is from New York. Anyone wondering what is old-timey about that little scenario has missed a technicality. Normally, she would not even ask me, because she can pick up her iPhone and find the answer to most of her questions on either Google or IMDB.
Tragically, however, on the inaugural occasion that she is forced to resort to asking me, I am constrained by the same limitations – no internet. Lacking knowledge of the distances between most cities and/or states in the USA, I am unable to provide any kind of estimation. So in that way too, it’s just like the old days, where parents would answer most questions from their children by saying “I don’t know, darling, but I do know that you need to clean your room if you want this week’s pocket money” – thus revealing to their offspring that they do not, in fact, know everything, and even what they think they know will turn out to be wrong.
Without you around this week, internet, I haven’t been able to check my Twitter feed every few hours as I’m in the habit of doing. I thought I might find it difficult to miss out on the usual stream of updates about current affairs, politics, arts events and social issues, but I’m coping better than expected. If it wouldn’t hurt your feelings, I would go so far to say that I am intensely enjoying a peaceful silence from the social media front.
Instead of feeling obliged to check through every Tweet in my Twitter feed (in case I miss something really interesting) I have been enjoying the long-forgotten feeling of being addicted to a book! – so much that I feel antsy when I have to stop reading briefly and put my book aside to make a meal or do the dishes. Bothersome tasks! I have to admit that on at least one, overcast, rainy day down here, I spent virtually the whole day lying on the couch reading a book, and barely thought about you at all. Sorry.
When the weather down here was warm enough, I also enjoyed the glorious outdoors. I went for an enormous walk from one end of the beach to the other that entirely justified buying and eating a double scoop of icecream at the kiosk (a scoop each of white chocolate & raspberry AND crème brulee) at the end of it. I drove all over the countryside, gazing at breathtaking views of lush green paddocks flanked by the icy blue of the ocean, set against a backdrop of dark, hazy blue, bush- covered mountains, sometimes seen through a sheen of mist.
Back at the shack, I sat outside and spied on wild rabbits nibbling on the grass, and enjoyed the sounds of magpies and other birds warbling in the trees surrounding me.
So although it’s been a bit weird to be without you for a whole week, I can’t say that it’s been much of a problem. I know this may come across as uncaring, but I really think this break has been good for us both, internet.
From my point of view, at least, it feels like a few cobwebs were swept out of my exhausted brain. (Personally, I think that’s the effect of being surrounded by trees for a few days – you should try it sometime, internet.)
But of course, dear internet, we both know that I couldn’t live without you in the long run. Well, I couldn’t live in the way to which I am accustomed, that’s for sure.
After all, I wasn’t able to publish this post until I got back home to Melbourne and had a connection to you, was I?
So I hope you’ll stick around. As in any relationship, I think that the occasional break from one another is a healthy thing.
Well, it’s good for me, anyway. Not sure if it’s had any effect on you.
Affectionately,
M.
Blathering About Nothing 
I think it’s probably good for everyone to get away from the internet for a little bit every year. Your holiday destination sounds fantastic!
And no, I don’t know the distances between any US cities either. They may look close on the map, but I keep forgetting how big America is 🙂
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My theory is that trees counteract fuzziness of the brain. I don’t even know distances between Australian cities but I can estimate how long it takes to fly. I think Melbourne to Perth takes about 6 hours, which from memory is about the same as San Fransisco to New York.
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If you get in a plane anywhere in Britain and fly in any direction for more than about an hour, you’ve left the country 🙂
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How delightful! Living in the south eastern part of Australia, one can head off to go to Britain, take off,watch a movie, eat a meal, follow up with drinks, watch another movie, have a little nap once the lights have been dimmed, wake up and think “we must be nearly at Singapore/Dubai/other halfway stopover”, congratulate yourself for being really patient,look at the graph on the screen – and discover that apparently you’re still moving slowly towards the coastline of Perth/Darwin/QLD (depending where you’re going).
That’s always a low point on the 20+ hr trip!
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Yeeks! The furthest I ever flew was the south of France and that was boring enough – 2 and a half hours 🙂
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Amendment: I should have said “the coastline of Western Australia, Northern Territory or QLD”. My excuse is that I was thinking about what to have for dinner while writing that comment. You will definitely never make it to Australia if you think a 2 1/2 hour flight is boring! You could fill time watching The Lord of the Rings:The Return of the King, and it would not even be finished yet when you landed. (referring to flight to France, obviously.)
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Ahh, I suspect that Internet is rather fickle — to many other ‘interests’ to even notice when we are not around!
Perth/Melbourne? Have just done it. Melbourne to Perth took about 4hours and P to M was under 3 (tail winds help). No idea about American cities though.
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I’ve never done it, but always thought it was 6…perhaps there is a time difference that confused me?? I have flown San Fran to NY – maybe I’m out by 2 hours there too!
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